It s him

One day I sat and thought. 'What am I doing? What is my life?' I thought of all the things I've made in my life, all my feelings, all my experiences. Pictures. Memories. Old movies. Others were not.

My life.

Would I ever have some say so and mean it? All my so called life is a dream I live in the real world, but releasing it in my own parallel universe. An animated universe. All my feelings came from comics, manga, stories, movies, pictures, everything that was not real. 14 years and not even an anime love, I could made, discover, create. I had actually tried. I tried to fall in love with my girl friend. And it also seemed as though I really liked liked her, but it quickly disappeared when I told her about it. I was miserable. I did not deserve to live a life in a world I could not feel at home in. So rather put an end to life, so someone else can get it.

The screen stood Microsoft Word open a document with no name. There were 4 options for suicide: rat poison, jumping, cutting the artery over, pills. But there was a drawback of them all.

Rat poison: I do not know where we got it along.

Jumping: I'll find a very high place, if I must be sure to die.

Cutting the artery over: The arm is of course most likely, but I do not about I have the strength to do so.

Pills: I hate pills. Although vitamin pills.

What should I do? How will I die? The question is always: "How on earth do I survive?" So how the hell do I find the answer on this question? I looked at the list again. No specific order. Hmmm ... Pills and rat poison is as the same effect, right?

I found a situation with all four ways:

The rat poison was in the hot cacao, had I even sprinkled in here at the cafe. I did not want to die at home, I would die with the people around me. When I lifted the cup to his mouth to take the first mouthful, a boy quickly passed, so I lost the grip on the cup and cacao poured out on the table. I turned just in time to see that the boy was a year older than me and had shoulder-length dark brown hair. Then it was gone.

Cutting the artery over was easy, when you walk in a desolate forest with a new sharpen dagger from girl scout and scratching trees. Even if we were told that "it should not." It was summer, it was hot and I had taken my jacket off and tossed it in the grass with daggers vagina. The dagger lie good in my hand. Neither too heavy or too light but just right. I lifted it to infection in the flesh, but a finger stopped me. The finger was long and lovely pale and contained fingertip against daggers point. I looked up and looked into the boy's eyes. His hair fell into them and he smiled as he shook his head. Then it was gone.

I stood on one or other building in any city and looked down in front of me. There were far down. Could I handle it? Yes! I could well and if I could not, so I should just close my eyes and imagine something really nice that I wanted the opposite. Just one step. I lifted my right foot and was about to step over the edge into the abyss of hard asphalt and stone, and people. Then something grabbed me from behind and I struggled clumsily against. He turned me on, so he stood with his back to the edge I was about to violate. This time he don't smiled. He was pale as a sheet and held still stuck in my shoulders even though I was not going off the edge anymore. Then I realized it. He suffered from acrophobia. I moved his hands and said, "Do not stop me next time." And then it was gone.

With the pills I was sure that the boy could not just show up and spoil it all. That he could not. It had to succeed! I took a glass out and would take some soft drinks and swallow the pills, but then we had no sodas. I poured the number of pills I would take, laid them in a little box and put it in my pocket. And then I took my bike to the grocery store to buy some sodas. When I came out of the store, I found the box up and poured the pills into his hand, screwed the lid of the soda and took a small sip. I looked around but did not see the boy. So I put my hand to my mouth and poured the pills in and washed down with soda. I was a little dizzy and supported me to the bike. I took a mouthful of the soda more and my vision and head became clearer. He stood in front of me and smiled. "Why did you not stop me this time?" I would know.
"You do not die of the little pills. You get much more than a stomach ache." He turned around. "And you told me to don't stop you." And with those words, it was gone.

I swore and swearing on the way down the stairs. Some had rung the door bell and I was unfortunately home alone. I checked my hair quickly in the mirror in the hallway before I went over and opened the door.

"Hi, I've just moved in next door, and my mom said I should find someone my own age to be with, so I waited until someone came and then I saw you come home from school. You seemed to be busy, so I did not catch you. So I waited, but you never came out again, so now I stand here and say 'Hello'." He smiled a crooked smile and held out a hand. "My name is William, but everyone calls me Will. What's your name? "

"It can be completely equally, but you're welcome to save me again and again and again."